Wisdom

December 10 – Wisdom

Wisdom. What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out?

(Author: Susannah Conway)

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Ooooh boy! The wisest decision I made this year…hmmm…have I made a wise decision? Every day is filled with decisions. Do I really want to eat that knowing full well it means an extra hard workout?  Hmmm, do I want a Pumpkin Spice Latte or a Soy Chai Latte?  What should I make for dinner?  What is my main character’s reasons for doing x,y or z? Where is my story going? Should I grow my hair out?  Should we pay this bill or that one first instead? It goes on and on and on…

Some decisions are minute while others are more grand in scale.  Sometimes making a decision, wise or not, has nothing to do with wisdom and everything to do with the situation, finances, emotions, ramifications.  Does wisdom have a seat at the table of decision-making? Of course, but sometimes it is just purely necessary and prudent to do something or decide something and at the same time – perhaps, not so wise.  I hope I am making sense.

I did decide to eliminate toxic people from my life.  I am an emotional sponge.  I pick up on the emotions and feelings of others and it greatly impacts my mood.  I can feel someone hurting, their stress, their sadness, their joy – it is like a radiating heat wave across the room that hits me.  It can strengthen me or weaken me.  Too often than not, it is the latter.  I’ve had too many people in my life who are “emotional vampires” – who suck my energy and who leave me drained once they’ve had their fill. Some do it knowingly while others have no idea.  I decided to not allow that to happen anymore.  I took some steps to protect myself and it, for the most part, is working.  So I guess you could say I did make a decision this year that was wise and well worth it.  It has also resulted in the loss of a few friendships as has progressively worsened an already crappy relationship between my father and me – which really is nothing new and nothing more than him revealing his true nature once again. <<sigh>>  He will never change and I know that – I’ve always known that – only difference is now, I just don’t care anymore.

I am finally finding some peace. It’s not easy, but in the long run, it is protecting my sanity.

 

 

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